What It Means for Muslim Women • The Muslim Women TImes


The world was so daring and assured in bullying us into believing that we’re solely worthy if our lives are marked by hardship. Embracing the soft-life is emboldening ourselves and altering the narrative.

If you’re somebody that’s in tune with international traits, you’d perceive that the time period “soft life” is now not simply restricted to captions on Instagram posts and Tiktok movies. You would perceive that it’s develop into a way of life for thus many – a way of life of full enjoyment and minimal stress. An intentional way of life, the place you get to present your self the VIP therapy. From shopping for your self the great belongings you deserve, to picking the best method to getting issues achieved, outsourcing duties that assist you to take the wanted relaxation, and leaving relationships marked by stress and toxicity, we have gotten increasingly more conscious of the softness that had hitherto been denied to us by poisonous cultures.

As Muslim girls, rewiring ourselves for softness and abundance will put us up in opposition to many hurdles from inside Muslim communities, which has completely nothing to do with Islam. We usually are not a monolith. This truly didn’t must be talked about, however very these days, we’ve got been reflecting on what precisely brings pleasure to Muslim girls. Against the backdrop of all the things we’ve got to reside by means of and in opposition to a tradition the place ‘self-care’ shouldn’t be overtly authorised of and the place guilt and disgrace are weaponised to maintain girls in line, the place do Muslim girls discover true pleasure? Whether you’re a mum, a inventive, or a lady on a mission to trot the globe, we predict there’s a lot magnificence within the various identities we tackle as Muslim girls and that is what makes us really fascinating as a collective. But regardless of this range, society has discovered a method to plaster a harmful stereotype on us as a demographic. Some widespread descriptors are “weak”, “submissive”, “obedient” and “oppressed”.

As we wrestle to wriggle out of the a number of layers of oppression wherein we discover ourselves, we have to acknowledge that the journey to breaking free from a tradition which celebrates martyrdom because the marker of womanhood is tough work. The journey to breaking out of worry, shortage and survival is an extended one, particularly once we can’t appear to attract the road between being obsessive about our lives and being self-absorbed. But deciding to go from survival mode to thrive mode is deciding that it’s you in opposition to all socio-cultural constraints that stop you from dwelling the mushy way of life you really deserve.

We like to see Muslim girls thriving, refusing to be shamed and dwelling in abundance and luxurious. This is a motion in opposition to the oppressive constructions put in place to carry us down. It is resistance in opposition to the narrative that we’re solely worthy when our very existence is marked by wrestle and endurance. It’s a lifestyke that claims “no more!” to the praise-singers who solely sing praises of ladies who select a lifetime of sacrifice and martyrdom. Soft life is selecting to recognise our self-worth. It’s about unlearning all the things that made us hate our very existence. It’s about therapeutic our inside wounds and treating ourselves with a lot love and kindness. The world was so daring and assured in bullying us into believing that we’re solely worthy if our lives are marked by hardship. Embracing the soft-life is emboldening ourselves and altering the narrative. It’s giving the center finger to those that desperately need to see us depressing. It’s unapologetically making out time to get to know who we’re and dwelling as our most genuine selves! Because once we get to know who we’re, nobody can inform us who we aren’t.

So how can we get to interrupt free from oppression and start dwelling the mushy life unapologetically? It begins by altering the tales we inform about ourselves. It begins by following these primary steps:

Get to Know Yourself

Carving out time to get to know your self is step one to constructing a loving relationship with your self. To do that, you should be taught and determine the qualities that make you distinctive. Daily reflection and meditation may also help make this journey seamless. You might want to recognise totally different elements of your id and character, and you will have to be trustworthy all through the method. Questions like “What do I love doing?”, “What do I love about myself?”, “What makes me feel happy?” “What triggers my anger and sadness?” “What mistakes have I made?” might enable you discover the solutions you search. You should take note of these points that make you uncomfortable and ask your self why they make you uncomfortable. Try to not criticise your self within the course of. You need to be type to your self and embrace all the things you discover; the great, the unhealthy and the ugly. Loving your self means loving all the things, together with the ugliest elements of your self, even when you’re attempting to develop into a greater individual.

Speak Well of Yourself

Speaking nicely of your self is the inspiration of self-worth and self-love. Highlight what you want about your self and discuss it everytime. Remind your self of your strengths and repeat it over and over. Be mushy with your self and you’ll start to fall head over heels in love with you. This vitality will spill over into your relationships. When you communicate nicely of your self and deal with your self with kindness, you’ll start to have little tolerance for many who discuss down on you and deal with you harshly. You will start to shed the relationships that don’t align with the mushy way of life you’re pursuing. You will sift out the individuals who disrespect and invalidate you. And you’ll start to draw solely the folks and issues which can be wholesome for you on this journey.

Pamper Yourself

Give the best type of your kindness to your self. Take your self out to good locations; locations that fill your physique, thoughts and soul with happiness. Buy your self issues that befit your highest self. Treat your self like royalty. Eat good meals, take your nutritional vitamins, put money into skincare, keep hydrated and do the issues that convey you pleasure. Refuse to hearken to the inside voice attempting to disgrace you and make you are feeling responsible for being obsessive about your self. When the world calls you “selfish”, embrace it. When they inform you you’re smug, proceed to bask within the glory of the self-worth you’re constructing for your self. Those who hate this model of you’ll fall out and you’ll appeal to the individuals who worth the mushy life simply as a lot as you do.

Romanticise Your Life

Slow down. To select intentional happiness is to decelerate and be in tune with your personal world. Many of us reside a rushed life, forgetting to concentrate to the issues that actually matter. The mushy life mindset requires that you simply take issues gradual and be conscious of all the things round you. Observe your prayers mindfully, sip that cup of scorching chocolate slowly, savouring its richness and appreciating each drop of it, take note of the superb road on which you reside, take within the magnificence and stillness of the morning, take good pictures of the world round you, learn that e-book slowly, name your senses to the attractive smells and sounds round you. This will calm your thoughts and nourish your soul and you’ll quickly realise how wealthy your world is.

Preserve Your Energy

Minding what you are promoting and detaching from over-involvement in different folks’s issues may cause folks to label you as “uncaring” and “selfish”. But you should put your self first by preserving your vitality and filling your personal cup. This can even enable you to drag out of co-dependent patterns. Preserving your vitality means unlearning that you simply’re by some means liable for folks’s issues and that you’ve an obligation to repair them. It shifts the main target to you and helps you shed all the additional burden that you simply’ve positioned on your self. This will make it simple so that you can focus in your objectives and obtain them.

Create Boundaries in Your Relationships

When you start to like your self, creating boundaries in your relationships comes naturally. Pay consideration to how your relationships make you are feeling. Do you are feeling careworn and drained after each interplay, or do you are feeling comfortable and energised? Whether it’s a platonic, romantic or work-related relationship, you should develop into extra assertive about your wants and limits. Let folks know upfront what you anticipate from them and what you received’t tolerate. Those who don’t want to honour and respect your wants and limits will naturally vibrate out of your life, making room so that you can appeal to the individuals who align with the imaginative and prescient you have got for your self.

Express Gratitude

Living in abundance is a really essential a part of dwelling a mushy life, and you can’t obtain this in the event you don’t categorical gratitude. Some of us grew up with a shortage mindset, specializing in what we lacked reasonably than what we’ve got been blessed with. Shifting the main target to all the things you like about your self and your life will open doorways of abundance and happiness, making you reside as much as your highest potential as a lady.

The mushy life is about dwelling in abundance and self-love as a lot as understanding that you simply solely go the place you’re valued. It’s about recognising your value and never ready for exterior validation. So whether or not you select to reside as a “soft baby girl” or a “rich auntie”, the onus is on you to do the work required to get there.

TMWT is an internet media platform spotlighting the tales of Muslim girls of the previous and current. We purpose to be some of the authoritative and informative guides to what’s taking place on the earth of Muslim girls. We hope to cowl key points, spark debates, progressive concepts and provocative subjects to get the Muslim world speaking. We need to set agendas and discover concepts to enhance the lives and wellbeing of Muslim Women.


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